Pac-Man Reigns terror on Halloween

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Andrew Cortez, Staff Writer

On Sunday October 31, 2021, a man who spray painted his entire body yellow ran around on Halloween smashing kid’s pumpkin candy holders and jack o’lanterns. The wild man ran around whist yelling out a “want, want” sound as he ruined kids’ nights and stole from fruit vendors. He is currently at the police station and when questioned he had this to say, “their following me, the ghosts, they are almost here”.

 Harold “Pac” Mandler, the person responsible for this incident works at the bank after attending Cal poly and works his normal 9-5. Harold was once arrested during his stay at college for DUI, battery, assault which resulted in his expelled from the school. There are many theories on why he’s doing what he is doing but the most popular one is that he is “broken” after seeing his friends.
 His wife Maria Mandler states that he was meeting up with old friends whilst dressed up like a yellow crayon and that’s when he got loose. She also revealed the names of Harold’s friends: Chad, Brad and Shad who were all born as triplets and their adopted brother Clyde. If you see any other crayons dressed in the colors RED, PINK, ORANGE, and BLUE contact the authorities, they may be just as dangerous.
 When questioned further on why he’s doing this he responded again with the “Want, Want” sound. But these questions remain: When will this game end? What happens if you cover the earth in pudding? And why do cats purr?